Guilty Or Not: Does Giving A Horse A Handy Count As Getting To Second Base?

Guilty Or Not: Does Giving A Horse A Handy Count As Getting To Second Base?

Guilty or Not

WAUSAU – A Wausau man accused of performing a sex act with a horse has been charged in Marathon County with bestiality.

Jared Kreft, 30, was charged with sexual gratification with an animal sex organ, possession of drug paraphernalia, possession of marijuana as a repeat offender and bail jumping, according to court records.

On Wednesday, Marathon County sheriff’s deputies were sent to a barn in the town of Wausau, where they found Kreft near a horse, according to court documents. Kreft was wearing a face mask, black jacket and blue wind pants with holes cut in the groin and buttocks areas, according to court documents.

He told deputies after he was arrested that he went to the barn and performed oral sex on the horse and tried to arouse the horse with his hand, according to court documents. He said he had viewed “horse pornography” before the incident.

Deputies also found a blue and red glass pipe often used for smoking marijuana and a jar of petroleum jelly.

Jared you do know you have the right to remain silent? I am pretty sure the first rule of horse fucking is to not tattle on yourself. What are you going to tell Nana when Wasau Swat is kicking down the stalls at the Equestrian University of Wisconsin (Nana’s basement) in search of your illegal pony porn (That is still on the no no list right?) on your Lonovo X 700 gaming console? I sure hope you remembered to clear the search history.

Final Verdict: Not guilty. Jared brought all his “equipment” ready for practice but was never ready for the big game.  

By the way can I have my Assless chaps back Nana sure is going to be sore with me?” 

On the plus side, it does looks you brought your “equipment” ready for practice but weren’t quite ready for the big game. 

HH

 

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